17 July 2012

Long Time Comin'

Now I'm gonna get birth naked and bury my old soul
And dance on its grave
And dance on its grave

(Bruce Springsteen - Long Time Comin')

Cirque de Pougnadoires, France.
September 2011.

It's been three weeks now since the day my dog died. I'm not sad because he's dead, I'm sad because I'll live another 40, 50, 60 years without ever seeing him again. This recent event has put me into a contemplative mood.
I've thought about the choices I've made, about how I've treated people, about what I want to do with my life for the next few years. 
It's been five and a half years since my 18th birthday... It was back then that I set goals that I wanted to achieve in five years...

While I still believe that I've made the right choices as far as my working life is concerned, I've come to the conclusion that I've made some really bad decisions when it comes to girls. There have been so many chances to be in a serious relationship, but it never seemed right and I couldn't resist the temptation of other girls. I can't turn back time, I can't right the wrongs, but I can do it better next time. 
And that's just what I've been trying to do lately... there's this woman, Anna - she's a customer at my coffee shop... I know exactly what she's going to order, and her face lights up when she sees me, holding her lactose free Vanilla Latte in my hands before she's even reached the counter... I love seeing her smile... she's gorgeous... I enjoy the small talk... now I've got a second job at the place she works at (she's a medical assistant and I'm locating and sorting patient files) so I get to talk to her more often, and the next time I see her, I'll ask her if she wants to have lunch with me, and after a while, I might ask her if she'd like to go out for dinner or cocktails. 
One of my friends once told me from the bottom of her heart that she thought I was an amazing guy and that I deserved nothing but the best... and if what that girl said to me all those years ago was true, this might be it... it definitely feels right... and that's why I won't fuck it up this time.

Tomorrow's Stage 16 of the 2012 Tour de France includes Col d'Aubisque and Col du Tourmalet, and Bradley Wiggins, a British racer, is wearing the yellow jersey. 
After I came home from work, I looked through my archives from last year's trip and found the picture above. The river that flows through the gorge is the famous Tarn. Click the following links to see more pictures taken in the Gorges du Tarn: #1; #2; #3; #4.


- Dom


Emm said...

I don't think we quite appreciate the impact that animals have on us. If I look at the sleepless nightsibe give me (I have four), I know I'm in for a bruising when they get older.

But contemplation is good. I often feel something traumatic needs to happen before I get around to the big decisions. I'm hoping for a slight hiatus on life-changing events right at the moment though.

Ask her out, take it slow. It sounds good.

T. Becque said...

This looks like parts of the states. Good luck on your girl. But remember our mistakes are never for nothing...unless it's a really, really bad mistake, then you just screwed up. Just kidding :)

Dominic Doherty said...


Yeah, animals have a great impact on us. I miss having my dog around. I haven't really been out for a walk since that day.

I hope all is well with you!

I will! :-)


Hahaha... yeah, I'm gonna try not to screw this up.